An Uncommon Encounter with Geriatrics Gone Wild
Hey, this blog is G-rated, so if you’re expecting to see naked senior citizens skinny dipping at night, you won’t find that here. However, this is exactly what we encountered one evening as we completed a night dive at one of our favorite dive sites on Bonaire!
The shore entry is perfect here: a simple sandy slope with an easy swim to the reef drop off. Private boats and small yachts are moored near the shore, so this is a no-wake zone. In over 20 dives here at all times of day and night, we’ve seen numerous varieties of fish, beautiful hard and soft corals, and at night the reef comes alive with eels, octopuses, small crabs and other nocturnal critters in search of a meal.
One particular night we enjoyed an especially exhilarating dive. Our good friends and dive buddies from New York had joined us for the evening, and we explored an old light beacon nestled in the reef at about 50 feet – pretty nondescript in the day but very eery at night – swam amongst a school of jacks dining on a large creole wrasse bait ball, and “assisted” a large tarpon with his evening meal as he followed our dive lights: our dive buddy would shine his light on a small fish and watch the tarpon swoop in sideways and gobble the easy meal right up! This was quite an amazing sight to see at night!
As we completed our dive, we did our safety stop about 15 feet or so below several of the boats moored near shore, so it was cool to observe their hulls jostle slightly in the water, tied up to their respective buoys. Everything seen underwater at night takes on a whole different demeanor.
We swam to shore, and just as we were about to surface and begin to take off our fins, our buddy flashed his light onto an extremely large, very odd-shaped object, which then started thrashing about wildly. Our buddy was right on the object and I came up behind him, only to note that this was indeed not one object, but TWO! Two very misshapen, rather saggy, grossly white – okay, I won’t go on – pair of buttocks! Human buttocks! And other indescribable human anatomy I cannot mention here.
We were all on the surface by then, and an elderly couple was trying to swim as fast as they could out of sight and out of reach of our powerful dive lights, with our buddy apologizing profusely, turning his light away from them. All things considered, our buddy stated calmly, “now, there’s something you don’t see diving every day.”
We exited the water and as we were taking off our gear, we noticed the couple slipping quietly out of the water in the dark, far away from us, towards the bushes where they must have stashed their clothes.
After this dive, we actually saw this particular couple again before we did three other night dives at Something Special; we found where they were hiding in the bushes, waiting for us to submerge so they could sneak out into the water. My buddy also noticed them walking ashore our last evening of this trip; I obviously did not get that close to see any more of them!
So kids, do you know where your grandparents are tonight?